Haven't been around much for the past few months. Sort of a combination of events culminated in my absence, or at least in my lack of presence for the most part. Crazy holidays season + emotional experiences + finals in school + needing to recharge the batteries = a lot of sleeping (in between bouts of insomnia.)
You ever write so much that you find yourself not able to write a single word you can appreciate? It's as if my mind becomes this junk pile and it's just full of poem fragments that I shaved off of other pieces until all I am left with is a bunch of junk that I can't snap together. That happened to me back in November, so I decided to take a complete break from writing. I haven't written a thing since the last poem I posted on here and, for the most part, it's been really nice to refresh everything. I know I've got some new words coming, and I've certainly got a lot going on inside that needs to break out. Hopefully you'll see the results soon.
I'm lonely. Severely. I feel as though the world is a big, dark space and I'm just a dot within it. This happens, from time to time, where I feel like I'm shrinking into some shadow I cannot define. I'm going to try to write my way out of it... but I keep waking up in the morning with these fantasies about disappearing. Just packing up and moving to Seattle or Iowa. Maybe it sounds crazy, but I'm tired of feeling like I'm a plug that can't find an outlet. I need something to jolt the system.
Thanks everyone for you comments, well wishes and notes. I apologize about the lack of response, but like I said, it's been sort of crazy for me. Hopefully I'll catch up with you all soon. I could certainly use the company.